Home Alone?
I know. We are all depressed that we have to come back to school during this beautiful January weather leaving behind the delights/horrors of our boring/stressful/exciting/relaxing/borderline criminal Christmas break. So, for those in need of some respite, I offer my tale of what happened to me this Christmas. Some of you may remember my tale of last Christmas were I was accidentally left behind by my family who were going to France and the ensuing mayhem I cause while being home alone. This year seemed much more promising as my family had decided to spend Christmas in Miami Florida. However, this plan went awry when I mistakenly boarded a flight to New York City.
Alone in a strange city I did the only rational thing and checked into a hotel using my Dad’s credit card (which I thankfully/luckily/serendipitously had with me) and ordered lots of room service and watched my favourite movie Angels with Dirty Faces. The next day being Christmas eve I went out to enjoy a little shopping and happened upon a store called Duncan’s toy chest where the kindly owner told me that all of the Christmas profits from the store would be donated to the Children’s Hospital.
Anyways, on my way back to the hotel I ran into my old friends the Wet Bandits and after escaping that I was also forced to flee from the hotel after the concierge confronted me about my dad’s credit card and how it was “stolen.” Remembering my Uncle Rob lived in New York I stopped by his place for a nice Christmas visit. Once I arrived I discovered that Uncle Rob was not there so instead I did the only logical thing which was to booby trap the entire place. It was lucky I did this because those nasty Wet Bandits followed me. I watched as they did all sorts of stupid stuff including: watching bricks get thrown at their faces, stapling their own butt, sliding around on grease-covered floors into shelves full of paint cans, getting tools dropped their heads, getting their heads set on fire and a clever revision of my old swinging paint can trick but with a huge iron pole. Those dang robbers are harder to keep down than Wile E. Coyote.
I was reunited with my mom in front of the Christmas tree in Rockefeller Plaza and my whole family was treated to a massive amount of Christmas presents and I was basically a Christmas hero until my dad found out I spent $967.43 on room service.
Oh well, here’s hoping my new year will be as adventurous as the last.
Kelsey
